Så jag håller på med att kolla på en tv-serie vid namn Veronica Mars.

Den är rolig, spännande, och rolig.
Därför tänkte jag dela med mig av det roliga.
Men först;
Veronica mars handlar om denna unga brud som går i skolan.
Hennes pappa om är ex-sheriff i orten är nu privat detektiv. Av honom
har hon hjälv blivit en privat detektiv. Där hon och hennes far löser
en massa fall som kommer och går under vardagen.
Samtidigt som dem försöker överleva varje vardag så normalt
som möljligt. hah! det finns inget som heter normalt!
Hon är känd för sina snäppa catchiga fraser. vilket jag kommer nu att dela med
mig nu. Det gller att man har ett lätt sinne för humor. Ja, ni fattar!.

Veronica:[voiceover] I'm never getting married. You want an absolute...well there it is. Veronica Mars: Spinster.

[Mrs. Murphy catches Vernonica napping in her class.]

Mrs. Murphy: Congratulations, you're my volunteer. Pope. An Essay on Man. Epistle I.

Veronica: "Hope springs eternal in the human breast; Man never Is, but always to be blest: the soul, uneasy and confined from home, rests and expatiates in a life to come."

Mrs. Murphy: And what do you suppose Pope meant by that?

Veronica: Life's a bitch until you die.

Eli "Weevil" Navarro: Sister. The only time I care what a woman has to say is when she's riding my big old hog. Even then, it's not so much words, just a bunch of "oohs" and "ahs" you know?

Veronica Mars: So it's big, huh?

Weevil: Legendary.

Veronica: Well , let's see it. I mean if it's as big as you say, I'll be your girlfriend. [bats eyes and gasps] We could go to prom together. What? What seems to be the problem? I'm on a schedule here vato.

Felix Toombs: Weevil, don't let blondie talk to you like that.

Veronica: Sounds like your buddy here wants to see it too.

Felix: Oh, hell, I'll show you mine!

Vice Principle Clemmons: Felix Toombs. What on God's green Earth is going on here? All right, gentleman, move along. [Weevil, Felix and others leave] Veronica, why does trouble follow you around? [Clemmons leaves]

Fire Chief: [about Veronica] Well, if it isn't Smokey the Barely Legal.

Wallace: That might play with the masses, but underneath that angry young woman shell, there's a slightly less angry young woman who's just dying to bake me something. You're a marshmallow, Veronica Mars. A twinkie!

Logan: Hey, Veronica Mars. Do you know what your little joke cost me?

Veronica: Well, I'm pretty sure you won't be getting your bong back.

Logan: [smashes a headlight] Wrong answer. Would you care to guess again?

Veronica: Clearly your sense of humor.

Logan: [smashes other headlight] Nope. And you're usually so good at pop quizzes. No, the correct answer is: my car. That's right, my Daddy took my T-bird away. And you know what I won't be having? Fun, fun, fun.

Veronica: You know what they say about Veronica Mars: she's a marshmallow.

Wallace: Another big Friday night. You got plans?

Veronica: I don't know. I might take Backup for a run or rent a movie, maybe.

Wallace: Hey, congratulations. You are officially Neptune High's most boring person.

Veronica: Did I mention the movie might be PG-13?

Wallace: Oh, jump back, wild child!

Veronica: What about you, Wallace? Your life still a non-stop Nelly video?

Wallace: Hey, at least I want my life to be a non-stop Nelly video.

Veronica: I gotta run. The counselor wants to see me before class.

Keith: About what?

Veronica: Uh, my schedule and my attitude, not necessarily in that order. Her words.

Troy: Flat?

Veronica: Just as God made me.

Troy: Are you always this persnickety?

Veronica: Sometimes I'm even persnicketier.

Veronica: [voiceover] They gave me a choice. I could stand by my dad, or stand by Duncan and my dead best friend's family. I chose Dad. It's a decision I live with every day. And you want to know the kicker? I don't even know what's true anymore. Maybe everyone else is right. Maybe Dad screwed up the investigation. Maybe I gave up my circle of friends - my life - over an error in Dad's judgment.

Wallace: Hi, sir. Wallace Fennel.

Veronica: [proudly] Wallace is a friend of mine. [Veronica performs a martial arts gesture with her hands.] Take that, high school guidance counselor.

Keith: So how did she rope you into this?

Wallace: She promised me all the answer keys to… Just promised to be my friend.

Keith: I'd have held out for a better offer.

Veronica: [voiceover] Tragedy blows through your life like a tornado, uprooting everything, creating chaos. You wait for the dust to settle, and then you choose. You can live in the wreckage and pretend it's still the mansion you remember. Or you can crawl from the rubble and slowly rebuild. Because after disaster strikes, the important thing is that you move on. But if you're like me, you just keep chasing the storm.

[Veronica arrives home from a date.]

Veronica: So, what did you think of him?

Keith: Oh, hey, you're home early.

Veronica: Oh, hey, did you run his license plate or did you get fingerprints?

Keith: I'm sorry, honey, what?

Veronica: You know you're not fooling me.

Keith: Okay. Veronica, I have no idea what you're talking about. [Veronica scoffs and starts to go to her room] Oh, hey, I forgot to tell you. If he's gonna be kissing my daughter on my porch for eight-and-a-half minutes, I'll need to meet him. Sweet dreams, honey.

Veronica: Is that really necessary?

Keith: He's taking up a lot of daddy/daughter time.

Veronica: [pretending to be drunk] They told me this was Sri Lanka! I wanted a coconut toddy!

Veronica: [still pretending to be drunk, to Wallace] I don't feel so good, Papa Bear!

[Later]

Wallace: "Papa Bear"?

Veronica: Never happened.

Keith: So, Veronica tells me, um, well, actually she hasn't told me anything about you.

Troy: Well, I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

Keith: Neither do I. [both laugh]

Troy: Well, if you have any questions or you know, you want a list of references or anything...

Keith: So, you going to the homecoming dance?

Troy: Oh yes, sir, if that's okay with you.

Keith: Oh, of course. And after the dance?

Troy: Well I think that Veronica said that she had to be right home after.

Keith: Yeah, good. And you're gonna stay for the whole dance. I mean, you're not gonna leave early and go to a party or a hotel, and still make it back by curfew?

Troy: No, uh, I mean, the whole point of going to the dance... is to go to the dance.

Keith: Good. Good. So you won't mind then, that I canceled your reservation at the Four Seasons?

Duncan: Oh, my God. They called the cops.

Veronica: They called my dad.

Lilly: This is like, the best dance EVER.

Veronica: [voiceover] You know those people who can predict when change is coming in their life? I'm not one of them. Change has a way of just walking up and punching me in the face.

Veronica: So far it's been a whole lot of brick walls, but I talked to my buddy Earl yesterday at the impound yard.

Troy: What do I love more? That you have a buddy named Earl or that he works at the impound yard?

Veronica: I'm guessing both. No sign of the Beamer. But he can get you a great deal on a Good Times van.

Troy: I'll pass that on to my dad when he gets back. Maybe it'll take his mind off of loading his gun.

Veronica: Here's a thought: If Tijuana was Logan's idea, then stealing the car could have been the master plan.

Troy: It was more of a meeting of the minds, if you will.

Veronica: Ah, so what was on the menu for this night of grand debauchery?

Troy: Let's see, uh, from eight to nine, we brainstormed on how to overthrow Kim Jong Il. From nine to ten, we deleted the records of the black voters of Florida. After that, it was, uh, yeah, it was all donkey shows.

Veronica: Ah, so the usual?

Troy: Pretty much.

[Veronica drags Luke into the bathroom.]

Veronica: We need to talk.

Luke: Alright, well does it have to be next to the feminine hygiene machine?

Veronica: I obviously know nothing about relationships.

Keith: But you can bake, and that's important.

Veronica: Tough day?

Keith: [imitating Phillip Marlowe] That ain't the half of it. See, this dame walks in, and you should've seen the getaway sticks on her. Says something's hinky with her old man.

Veronica: [imitating Marlowe] Did ya put the screws to him?

Keith: You ain't kiddin', he sang like a canary.

Veronica: [normal voice] You're in luck, Phillip Marlowe, because it's dessert for dinner night, and I've got a sundae thing set up here.

Keith: [normal voice] If child services finds out about this, they will take you away.

Veronica: Well, that's a risk I'm willing to take.

Keith: Honey, shouldn't we try something at the base of the food pyramid? You know - fruits and vegetables.

Veronica: [gasps] What is that? A maraschino cherry?

Lilly: Check you out, Veronica Mars. You're like a rocker chick now. You and I, we'd have a lot of fun together. Yeah, if, um, if I wasn't dead and stuff.

Veronica: Why are you here?

Lilly: Don't you watch any horror movies? My soul is doomed to walk the earth until justice has been served.

Veronica: Really?

Lilly: Yeah, that, and as kinda a side project, I dispense fashion advice.

Veronica: I want to find out who this kid is and what room he voted in.

Wallace: And I want a statue of myself in the main lobby - holding a musket, staring down danger. Since we're talking about stuff we want.

Veronica: Please?

Wallace: How hard was that?

Clemmons: Mr. Echolls, I was wondering if I could have a word?

Logan: "Anthropomorphic." All yours, big guy.

Clemmons: Oh. [fake laugh] Your father has generously offered to donate a pair of boots for our school fundraising auction.

Logan: Not the ones made for walking? God, I love those boots.

Logan: They teach you manners in ESL?

Weevil: If I was gonna cheat, don't you think I'd pick somebody smart?

Logan: If you "was gonna"?

Mr. Daniels: Ah, alas, you both get zeroes. No talking during tests.

Logan: I guess Mrs. Daniels ain't giving it up at home, huh?

Mr. Daniels: You know, the glow of your father's wealth and celebrity may be enough to sustain you through high school, Mr. Echolls, but do you know what it will get you in the real world?

Logan: [sarcastically] Please say "high school English teacher." Please...say "high school English teacher." [Weevil snickers]

Mr. Daniels: Mr. Navarro. I wonder if you'll find Mr. Echolls so amusing ten years from now - when you're pumping his gas.

Mr Daniels: This is punishment, gentlemen, not party time.

Logan: Well, that would explain the absence of balloon animals.

Veronica: Think I've got a future in the biz?

Keith: I think you've got a future as a highly paid Ivy League-educated executive of some sort who never thinks about private investigation again in her perfect life. Now... let's do something normal fathers and daughters do.

Veronica: Buy me a pony?

Keith: I was thinking I'd watch TV and you'd rub my feet.

Veronica: Hmm. Yeah, that's normal.

[Meg]: Veronica? Did you find your clothes? [looks down at the toilet to see Veronica's clothes almost flushed]

Veronica: Well, does this towel make me look fat?

Meg: You need something to wear? [they walk out of school with Veronica wearing a cheerleading uniform] I usually have sweats in my locker. Sorry.

Veronica: No, this is perfect. I just have to resist the urge to do a cartwheel.

Veronica: You ready to put the hurt on that Pythagorean theorem?

Wallace: You don't even want to mess with me on that today. I just about merked my mom's crazy, no-rent-paying tenant this afternoon.

Veronica: That guy's sleazy, so I hope merked means something bad. You know, my dad's still got that sheriff sheen. He's great at scaring people away.

Wallace: No, I got it covered. [Keith enters the room]

Veronica: Seriously, you should talk to him.

Keith: Am I giving you the birds and bees again, Wallace?

Veronica: Oh, God.

Mac: What?

Veronica: My outbox. There's an e-mail from me to my ex-boyfriend.

Mac: Duncan Kane? [Veronica looks at Mac] You used to be all anyone gossiped about. You still are. Just... a different way. So, what does it say?

Veronica: "Dear Duncan, I want you to know that I still love you very much, and I think about you constantly. Everytime I see you, my heart breaks. I need to tell you that when we were dating, I had VD. I hope you didn't catch anything from me." Am I naked? Because in my nightmares, I'm usually naked.

Veronica: [voiceover] Forbidden barn? Check. Implied polygamy? Check. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a cult.

Veronica: [voiceover] Enough already with this mellow "Incense and Peppermints" vibe. Let's break out the mushrooms and dance naked, strap on the goatskull headgear, sacrifice a few infants. Come on people, you're cultists. Start acting like it.

Veronica: [voiceover] Wow, it's bizzaro world. Out here I'm Miss Popular.

Veronica: [voiceover] I can't get it out of my mind. Somewhere in Pennsylvania a lab tech is determining if I'm heir to a billion-dollar fortune. It's not about the money. It's about making Jake Kane pay. But if I am an heiress, [Southern accent] as God is my witness, I'll never take cold showers again!

Veronica: [tilts head] Hey.

Weevil: See, there you go with that head tilt thing. You know, you think you're all bad-ass, but whenever you need something, it's all [mimics Veronica's head tilt] "Hey."

Veronica: Just be glad I don't flip my hair. I'd own you.

Veronica: Look at you, all helpful.

Logan: Hey, your peskiness being unleashed on Connor brings me joy. Annoy, tiny blonde one! Annoy like the wind!

Veronica: [voiceover] What was I thinking? Christmas in Neptune is, was, and always will be, about the trappings: the lights and the tinsel they use to cover up the sordidness, the corruption. No, Veronica, there is no Santa Claus.

[Veronica and Weevil walk up to Logan, Duncan, and Sean who are all enjoying some pizza.]

Veronica: So, good news, bad news. Good news is I know who stole the money. Bad news is I know who stole the money.

Jackson:I hear you do detective stuff for people.

Veronica: I do favors for friends.

Jackson: I can pay.

Veronica: Sit down, friend.

Lamb: Veronica Mars. Is your daddy here or is he busy peeking in people's windows?

Veronica: You stop dressing up like Little Bo Peep, he'll stop peeking.

Veronica: [in jail] Know any good lawyers?

Cliff: Very cute. I know an adequate one that just posted your $500 bail.

Veronica: They take Diner's Club here?

Wallace: This mission better involve me seducing the head cheerleader.

Veronica: I need you to poke around and see if you can get me a fake ID. If you must seduce the head cheerleader in order to accomplish your mission, so be it.

Wallace: No sweat! How do I do it?

Veronica: Play on her insecurity.

Wallace: I meant the fake ID.

Veronica: Hi, Dad. Their case is fuzzy and circumstantial.

Keith: You know the odd thing? Those were also her first words.

[Veronica]: [In Lamb's office] And I'll be over here chillin' like a villain.

Lamb: [reading off of a $50 bill] Veronica Mars is... smarter than me.

Veronica: [slaps Lamb playfully] Oh, you stop it!

Keith: Hey honey, what's cooking?

Veronica: Not sure myself. Something that ends in -aroni.

Lilly: I'm ditching his party this weekend 'cause I don't want him getting all crazy violent every time a boy undresses me with his eyes, which happens all the time. It's not my fault. I can't help it--God made me fabulous.

Logan: There's a woman who saw my mom get out of her car and get in a van with a "mysterious stranger."

Veronica: There's also a jungle tribe that worships Donald Trump's hair. It's a tabloid.

Logan: So the girl with a pig arm can't really bowl?

Veronica: I just don't want you to get your hopes up.

Logan: I'm not paying you to worry about my hopes; I'm paying you to follow leads.

Veronica: I wasn't aware you were paying me.

Logan: This isn't a favor. It's a job, you know. I mean, we're not exchanging friendship bracelets.

Veronica: I'll stop braiding.

[Veronica is looking at a trophy case.]

Weevil: If you're looking for my trophy, it's back by auto shop.

Veronica: Lube job? Or, can you medal in stealing hub caps?

Weevil: Is this 1970? Rims, baby.

Veronica: So you got a trophy for a rim job?

Weevil: Forget it. Look, I got some information for you.

Veronica: Finally! A Deep Throat to call my own.

Weevil: I'm not going to touch that one.

Veronica: How hard can it be to find an actor named Tom Cruz?

Wallace: Tom Cruise? Not as good a private eye as I thought.

Wallace: Damn. This dog is a freak show. He oughta be in show biz.

Veronica: D'you think that's some kind of rare breed or something?

Wallace: That or a drunk dingo had a three-way with an ocelot and a porcupine.

Keith: Don't forget. You're a high school girl. Do some high school girl things now and then.

Veronica: Relax, Dad. I'm cutting pictures of Ashton out of Teen People as we speak.

Duncan: Great game the other night man. Eighteen points, eight assists.

Wallace: On the streets we call those dimes.

Veronica: Streets? You live on the corner of Pleasant Valley and Marigold.

Weevil: Wait a minute. You went to a pet store and took a picture of yourself with a parrot so people would think you were cool?

Wilson: Yeah. All right?

Weevil: That's this close [uses thumb and finger to illustrate] to taking a hot cousin to your prom. Go home.

Leo: I hate to bribe you, but... I'm fairly certain that aiding and abetting qualifies me for a dinner date.

Veronica: Actually, it qualifies you for dinner and a movie, but you undershot, so...

Leo: Damn!

Veronica: Can you do me a weird favor without asking any questions?

Wallace: Isn't that the bedrock upon which our friendship was founded?

Veronica: Hello? Yes, this is 'Miss Sabrina'. A bad boy? Well...Nestor Greely of Encinitas, twenty grand on credit cards, two divorces, and a repo'd Sebring. You have been a bad boy! Miss Sabrina commands you: put your pants back on and get a job!

Keith: Guess who stopped by today?

Veronica: If you say Josh Hartnett, I'm gonna be so bummed.

[Veronica enters the house after kissing deputy Leo goodnight.]

Keith: Veronica, we need to talk.

Veronica: [in Southern accent] He's a fine gentleman, Pa. He'll come up with the dowry to marry me, just you wait.

Veronica: Dear Seventeen, how can I tell if the really cute boy in my class has a crush on me? No, strike that. Dear Seventeen, how can I tell if the really cute boy in my class murdered his sister?

Wallace: He's not gropin' her, is he?

Veronica: No, but earlier I saw him cutting a hole in the bottom of the popcorn bucket.

[Veronica calls Mac for yet another computer-tech favor.]

Mac: What did you ever do before you met me?

Veronica: Ever see the first 10 minutes of 2001: A Space Odyssey? It was a lot like that.

Logan: Hey, I need your help.

Veronica: Would it be weird for me to start my own drinking game? Like, I have to do a shot every time someone asks for my help?

Logan: Do you think Lilly loved Weevil?

Veronica: I don't know. Um, Lilly never mentioned anything to me about Weevil. I was wondering when you were going to ask me about that.

Logan: Yeah, well… I don't know. When he's caught in her bedroom, you know, I guess you gotta think.

Veronica: You're handling it a lot better than I thought you would.

Logan: I loved Lilly. And Lilly loved guys.

Veronica: Logan, you know that —

Logan: You know, she used to say that her… her parents worshiped Duncan and tolerated her. And if she couldn't please 'em, she was going to go out of her way to piss 'em off. Weevil must have been perfect for that.

Veronica: I know Lilly loved you.

Logan: Just not like I loved her. [pauses] It's okay. No, you know, it kinda lets me off the hook. You know, I… You know, I don't have to feel guilty anymore.

Veronica: Feel guilty about what?

Logan: Movin' on. [he kisses her]

Veronica: What are we doing? [they giggle]

Logan: No idea. [resume kissing]

Veronica: We need to talk about this.

Logan: I know.

Veronica: Maybe we should just keep it to ourselves for awhile and see what happens.

Logan: Meet in mop closets? Pass each other secret notes in the hallway? [pauses] Come on, I'll drive you home on the back streets.

Veronica: I'll be at home. With the only sane member of the Mars family.

Keith: The one who eats from the garbage and keeps bringing me dead birds?

Veronica: That's the one.

Logan: I am beyond tardy for my physics class. If I remember right, time travel is not yet possible.

Veronica: So try petty corruption. Tardy excuse slips, date-stamped, untraceable. [pauses] I know people

Veronica: No offense, but you look... odd.

Wallace: I just watched our parents cuddle on the couch last night. My eyes - they burn.

Veronica: Any idea what our parents do Mondays and Wednesdays from 6:00 to 10:00 that requires an overnight bag?

Wallace: As far as I'm concerned, they play bingo at the V.F.W. That's my story. I'm sticking with it.

Keith: How was school?

Veronica: You know - mean kids, indifferent teachers, crumbling infrastructure.

Logan: So, the place is ours. Dad's at class. Trina's at an extremely important purse-store opening in Beverly Hills.

Veronica: Your Dad is taking classes?

Logan: Exploring the world outside himself. All part of the new Aaron Echolls. Spanish, ceramics, tae kwon do and today, glassblowing with Silvio Pirelli, master of Old World crystal. [points to glass piece] Nice, huh? Just two lessons.

Veronica: And he made a bong?

Logan: An urn for my mom. You know, since there was no body and thus no ashes, he filled it with seawater. Because she jumped into the ocean. Get it? At least it gets him out of the house. [they kiss]

Veronica: Hey. Do you think this thing... will ever get more normal?

Logan: What, like, will we ever hang at the mall and hold hands and buy each other teddy bears with hearts that say "I wuv you beary much?"

Veronica: Yes. Exactly that. Except I want my bear won through some sort of demonstration of ring-tossing ability.

Logan: Secrets are kinda hot, too. [they kiss]

Logan: Ah, mass transit. But why take the bus when you can drive your very own rust bucket? I had my dad's driver pick it up. Full of fresh stolen parts, ready to go.

Veronica: Wow. I'll just try to keep this little gesture in mind this weekend when you and Dick and the Beaver are off getting blasted and scamming cheerleaders.

Logan: Yeah. Yeah, actually I had to tell Dick I'm not available. Because I have other plans.

Veronica: There are cheerleaders with low self-esteem available domestically?

[Veronica working on her car, with the hood up, because it stalled, Dick, Beaver, and Logan walk up.]

Dick: Uh-oh, someone's got their eye on that Miss White Trash title.

Beaver: Yeah, and making a solid effort in the talent competition, but I'd like to see that car up on some cinder blocks.

Logan: Guys, come on.

Veronica: I know... "Guys, come on! The talent is making a grilled cheese sandwich on the engine block." "Guys, come on, you can't put your car up on blocks in the yard if you don't have a yard."

[She grabs the pocket knife Logan is using to cut his apple, and uses it to cut a tube in the engine and hooking it up to some other part of the machine.]

Veronica: You know I think I can do both sides of this little act now.

[Turns the key and the car starts.]

Veronica: So how 'bout next time you don't bother; I got it covered.

[Throws Logan's pocket knife back to him, and shuts the hood of her car]

Veronica: You can keep asking, but you're not the fairest. Trust me.

Madison: Well, I can tell you who the pastiest is. What's the deal - can't buy bronzer with food stamps?

Veronica: You wrote "slut" on my car last year at Shelly's party. Why?

Madison: Because "whore" had too many letters.

Dick: [upon seeing Veronica] Dude, what the hell are you doing? Please tell me this is like, some new reality show called My Skank.

Logan: Goodbye, Dick.

Dick: What?

Logan: Get out of my house. You have a problem with Veronica, you leave. Actually, you have a problem with Veronica, you're pretty much dead to me, so just, like, evaporate or something, I dunno. That's pretty much a general invitation. If you don't like my girlfriend, then start heading towards the big rectangle with the knob.

[Duncan leaves.]

Lamb: [tapping finger on table] You said you were in Mexico the day of Lilly's murder. Why?

Logan: How many episodes of NYPD Blue did you have to watch to get that finger tapping down?

Lamb: I asked you a question.

Logan: And I ignored it and moved on. Keep up. [snapping fingers]

Logan: So I guess we broke up, huh?

Veronica: What do you want me to say, Logan?

Logan: "Logan, I'm gonna go home and put my head in the oven because I can't go on living knowing what a heartless bitch I am!" Something like that.

Veronica: So you're saying you want me dead?

Logan: Yes.

Veronica: One word from me and Backup goes for your throat.

Logan: [scoffs] Is that what you'd do, boy? You'd tear out my throat? [kneels down to dog] Who's a man killer, huh? [Backup kisses Logan] Who's a man killer?

Veronica: Isn't it better like this?

Lilly: So much better.

Veronica: This is how it's supposed to be.

Lilly: Totally.

Veronica: This is how it's going to be from now on. Right? Lilly?

Lilly: [sighs] You know how things are going to be now, don't you? You have to know.

Veronica: Just like this. Just like this.

Lilly: Don't forget about me, Veronica.

Veronica: I could never.

och där slutar säsong 1, jag kommer att lägga upp roliga bitar från säsong 2 &3 senare.
Hoppas ni gillade detta!!!